Worm Eater

Ramona has proven herself to be disgusting, fat, and horrid yet again: Ramona is eating earth worms outta the back yard. At first I thought she was merely harvesting them for our fishing trip, but upon further inspection of her spotted muzzle and fetid breath, Ramona gave herself up as a worm-eater, and is hiding in her bed. Perhaps it can be explained as a vitamin deficiency, but Megan and the Boy take care to supplement our diet with many treats and candies, including yogurt (which makes my coat shiny, and my flatulence moist and delicious). I hope that the Boy will shackle Ramona in the basement, because I'm tired of her worm-eating ways! If they don't do something about it, I will: it will involve strychnine, toe-nail clippers, a cactus, and some Flinstone vitamins. I'll show that love-pilfering butt-scrub a thing or two about what appropriate to eat! And then perhaps I can get that cooking show I've always wanted...