Nipple Clip

This is what I did today:
--snortched in the yard
--licked my anus (it tasted like potato chips)
--wiped my face on the Boy's pants
--ate my breakfast (it tasted like dogfood)
--told Gertrude to go to hell
--told Ramona to go to hell
--begged for treats by sitting on my mat in the kitchen and looking at the boy for hours
--barked a some birds that invaded the yard, barked at that beagle who always walks by at 6, barked at the mailman, barked at Gertrude and Ramona, barked at a tree, and barked after Gertrude and Ramona barked to show that I could bark, too
--waited for Megan to come home and rub my belly
--watched the Boy clean the house so that I could make it dirty again, that was great
--panted and smacked my lips when they were trying to sleep so that the boy thre his slipper at me, which I dodged skillfully
--listened to Bob Marley